Happy New Year, darling! ♥

January 1, 2005 I asked my bf last thursday if we could meet up somewhere near my house so we can talk. I told him that I'm a bit sad for a reason that me, myself don't know... that's what I told him. (yeah, I'm weird -_-; Well, err... I do know the reason why. I kept thinking aboout my life.. full of feign.. It'snot that I'm not honest to him or to my friends. It's just that I don't want them (the people who are close to me) to know... that's why I pretended to be happy and made up stories to cover up my sadness. And so I became hooked to internet and became another person. This is not the real me, I know that. I am confused.. I really don't know what I really want- that was what I told him.

He knows it. He knows that I'm afraid of our relationship...... that it willbe just like the relationships or "not really relationships" I had. That day, I told him that I wish it's january 2005 coz I really have this feeling that I was jinxed last year -___-;;; What I did'nt tell him is that ther came a time that I was thinking maybe I'am not nlove with him.. maybe the thought of being inlove and be loved just thrills me.. maybe I really don't love him... what if that's the truth

Don't think of me of anything. I am not the kind of person who plays on people's hearts. I really really love him. I am just afraid to lose him.


WARNING: TAGALOG ENTRY AHEAD
Happy New year, yeah... pero umiiyak kaninang madaling araw sa akin si Treb. Kasalanan ko naman. Di ko napigilang sabihin sa kanya yun *points at the orange bold texts above*.... Pero ang totoo nyan, di ko alam kung yan ba talaga yung nagpaiyak sa kanya. Pinaguusapan din kase namin kanina si megumi at yung parang pinagbabawalan ko siya or something.. dunno -_-. Di ko nga alam na umiiyak na siya nun eh (pero nasesense ko, kalala ko lang garargar yung phone) .. Umiyak na rin ako.. ayokokase syang mawala sa buhay ko..

x_sumoru @ 11:44 AM
7 comments
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Comment posted on March 6th, 2010 at 10:46 PM
Menschen mitgefohlt habe der mit roten Flecken vorne gestanden ist und sein Referat gehalten hat.
Comment posted on January 2nd, 2005 at 01:57 AM
happy new year. ^_^ thanks for dropping by my site. mmm... *looks at ur profile* you haven't added me yet. but i'll add yah na. ^_^
Comment posted on January 1st, 2005 at 07:19 PM
nakow.. bnaka naman all you need is assurance from him.. takot kang mawala sya sayo? lahat naman may feeling ng ganyan eh xD
Comment posted on January 1st, 2005 at 07:30 PM
yeah I know :(
Comment posted on January 1st, 2005 at 05:36 PM
<a href="http://www.tabulas.com/~makkun/jump6.html">http://www.tabulas.com/~makkun/jump6.html</a>

i don't play with people's hearts too. but i pretend a lot.. >_
Comment posted on January 1st, 2005 at 07:16 PM
yeah... but I guess mine's different.. I am so afraid to lose him that parang gusto ko ng ako na ang lumayo.. dunno para tong siguro like when a girl is about to marry d ba.. parang gusto nyang magbackout? d ba may ganon? *scratches head*
Comment posted on January 1st, 2005 at 05:35 PM
meh gawd. we're like teh same person... -____- i am soo confused with myself. >.

x_sumoru version 1.0 utada hikaru

thankx for visiting my tabulas! actually this ish my third tab- the first one is friends only, the second is public but is on hitaus ^.^;; and the third one is well your looking at it right now eheheh. nahh, I wont tell the links of those tabs :p

x_sumoru..well, that's moi Ü

err, x_sumoru, not my real alias actually. used it because.. of course I don't want to reveal my identity n_n

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